Survivor
by grazingalpaca
Summary: "I swear peeta Mellark will make it because he's a survivor" rated T for sexual themes and minor cursing. I'm discontinuing this story because I find it extreamly difficult to write this after reading Mockingjay. Sorry!
1. Reflections

**Survivor**

**This story is about Katniss reflecting about what has happened after Peeta has been rescued from the Capitol, but he is in critical condition and has not woken up yet. This takes place in District 13, in a hospital. **

_He was so beautiful. So amazing. And he chose me. Why, Peeta? _

He stirs in his heavily drugged sleep. Will he ever wake? Will I ever see those deep, blue eyes that I yearn for?

_Why didn't you find some silly, pretty girl to love, care for? No, he chose, me. Katniss. Simple, plain Katniss. _

I hold your hand, in a fruitless attempt to connect with the barely lifeless form I see before me.

_You shouldn't have strayed into my troubled life. I made you lose your leg and got you kidnapped. Tortured daily for secrets you didn't have. It should've been me._

_But I fell in love with you. Now I realize that. And all I want is for you to be is healthy and happy. You will never be that when you are with me. _

I lightly stroke your soft, blond hair and I watch as your mouth seems to curl up slightly.

_I wonder what you're dreaming about. Sometimes, when I stay overnight, I hear your moans and screaming. Nightmares, I assume. What you've experienced in those terrible Capitol torture rooms must be extremely terrifying. _

Before, you didn't make a sound. Now, every sound that crawls out of your mouth feels like a spear piercing my heart.

The doctors say that they can't help you; we just have to 'wait it out'. I don't care.

_Every day, sit in a heap next to you, kissing your face, crying, knowing that you won't be able to return the gestures but trying anyway. _

I lay my head down on your chest, sniffling, and end up falling into a deep slumber.

I awake to the rustle of a soft blanket being pulled over my shoulders and hear a deep voice grunt.

_Gale. _He's happy these days, deep in love with Madge. He's gotten over me, and accepts the fact that I love Peeta, although we still remain close friends. I swear, he's going to make it because Peeta Mellark is a survivor. I hear the gentle sound of a door closing and I close my eyes to be lured to sleep by the slow, even lulls of Peeta's breath as he sleeps.


	2. Suprises

**Survivor: Chapter 2**

**Thanks for the reviews, :) Barely an hour after I posted it, I got 2 reviews! **

**Ha-ha… I sound like a loser! Eh, I am one so who cares!**

**Anyway, I'm starting this chapter out as a songfic and I'm going to see where it goes. I think I'm going to have to end this story this chapter. Sorry!**

**The song is The Tip of the Iceberg by Owl City. (Imagine it more somber, though, lol)**

**Read and enjoy! **

_Welcome back winter once again  
And put on your warm fuzzy sweater  
'Cause you'll feel much better when_

The snowflakes fall gently to the ground  
The temperature drops and your shivers  
Freeze all the rivers around  
But I keep you warm

As the nurse checks over Peeta's vitals, I stare intently at his face.__

If speed's a pro, inertia must be a con  
'Cause the cold wind blows  
At precise rates  
When I've got my ice skates on

We sure are a sad bunch. Dragging each other into our troubles and our lives.__

If all the roads were paved with ice  
That wouldn't thaw or crack  
I could skate from Maine to Nebraska  
Then on to Alaska and back  
'Cause you keep me warm

But I'm not afraid, because we have each other. I'll never leave his side. Except to go to the bathroom…__

Peer over the edge, can you see me?  
Rivulets flow from your eyes  
Paint runs from your mouth like a waterfall  
And your lungs crystallize

I'll travel the sub-zero tundra  
I'll break glaciers and frozen lakes  
And that's just the tip of the iceberg  
I'll do whatever it takes to change

I'll be prepared when the time comes. We all will be. Peeta and I, we're a team. I have a feeling he's going to make it.__

Farewell powdery paradise  
We'd rather skate on the thinnest ice  
Fingers failed us before they froze  
Frostbite bit down on all our toes

Almost as if he can hear my thoughts, he smiles, unconsciously. __

Snow drifts build up and enfold us  
As we wait in this winter storm  
So we snuggle close in the darkness  
And keep each other so warm

***One Week Later* (Katniss is sleeping next to Peeta's hospital bed)**

Something's not right. I feel…a hand…touching my head. I ignore the feeling until, a soft yet hoarse voice calls my name. It sounds familiar, but different in a way.

"Katniss," the voice says, as if it was rolling the sound around its mouth, testing it out. That scared me, and I snapped up and stared at the owner.

"Peeta?" I whispered.

***End***


	3. Memories

**Survivor Chapter 3:**

**Hey guys! Ha-ha, I just found out that my science teacher is Team Peeta but my Social Studies teacher is Team Gale. What about you guys? Gale or Peeta? Team Peeta forever!**

**Oh, and thank you especially nappy sappy happy for convincing me to continue this. :)**

_"Katniss," the voice says, as if it was rolling the sound around its mouth, testing it out. That scared me, and I snapped up and stared at the owner._

_"Peeta?" I whispered._

I was sitting near Peeta's hospital bed, spooning him small amounts of thin soup. He was sitting up, listening quietly as I rambled on about how everybody was doing and how things were.

I looked up at him nervously, wondering if he thought I was crazy.

"Put down the soup, please Katniss." He says so softly I can barely hear his voice.

"Um, okay." I set the bowl on a small table.

"We need to talk…"

"We don't have to if you don't feel like it."

"No, I want to."

There were no scars or bruises from the torture. I guess that's thanks to the excellent technologies of the capitol. Peering at his flawless face, I can tell that the fire that was once in his eyes is now a dying ember. He'll never be the same again.

"How…how did they do it?" I asked, ashamed at myself for asking such a question.

*Switch to Peeta's POV*

"They beat me until I blacked out, the first few days I wouldn't tell what I 'knew'," I said as remembered the painful beatings, "Then they drowned me. It was terrifying. They held me down and shoved me into a bathtub full of cold water."

Katniss' eyes were full to the brim with tears. I'm sorry, my love. I didn't mean to. I shouldn't have told you.

"Hey, I'm sorry. I should stop."

"No. Start from the beginning."

"Okay, fine. Tell me to stop whenever..."

*FLASHBACK*

I woke up on an ice-cold table, tied at the neck, wrists, waist, and ankles. I had a gag in my mouth, preventing me from making a sound.

_What? Where am I?_ I wondered. _Being tied to a table _cannot_ be something good._

Right. The Games. We were going to set a trap, I think, and…Katniss! Where is Katniss?

I swung my head around wildly to survey the room. All I saw was a television, a table of knives, and a tape recorder. Wait. A table of knives? My eyes widened in alarm.

I tugged at the restraints and found that they were bound tightly. Not. Good.

Ten minutes later, 2 men walked into the room. One of them was tall and thin, with black hair and a sneer on his face. He wore pasty white scrubs, and had multiple ear piercings. The other was built wide, with bulging muscles and looked extremely intimidating. Tattoos covered every inch of his body.

"Well, so nice to see that you've come around, Peeta," said the taller man. "Welcome to the Capitol." The strong man grinned, showing all of his razor sharp teeth.

"If I take off your gag, will you be quiet?"

I shook my head.

The man leaned down and whispered in my ear, "Now listen, pretty boy, you won't make a sound unless directed or else my friend here will take care of you. Okay? Okay." He patted my head and withdrew.

I glared at him but he could tell I was hiding my fear. He smirked. He pulled off the gag and I was quiet.

They questioned me for hours, on everything from my friends and family to the revolution and what I knew about it. I said nothing. For each question I refused to answer, the strong man slapped me hard on the face.

Hours passed, and my whole face was numb. I didn't feel the pain at all. I smiled at them. Both of them looked surprised and angry with my reaction.

"We'll both be back tomorrow. But remember, there's no escape. No more of that little bitch to help you out, pretty boy."

I screamed in rage and pulled harder at the ropes. How dare they call her a bitch?

"Go to hell, you bastard." I snapped.

He snarled and punched me in the face, hard.

I gritted my teeth to avoid giving him the satisfaction of hearing my pain.

"I thought I told you not to do that, stupid."

I narrowed my eyes and growled at them.

The strong man punched me in the head and I was knocked out.

Over the course of the next few weeks, they burned me, drowned me, cut me, whipped me, and beat me.

Of course, there was always the mental torture. The tape recorder had recordings of Katniss screaming and crying out for help. I couldn't help but struggle on the restraints. In fact, I struggled so hard that by the end of the tape, my wrists were bleeding and cut up.

Every day, it was the same thing. Wake up. Eat stale bread. Beating. Questions. More beating. Cutting. Burning. Repeat. It was my own personal hell.

*END FLASHBACK*

Katniss was in tears, they were running down her face like rivers. I wish I could hold her. Wipe away her tears. Make her feel better. But I can't. I'd probably collapse and pass out from my exhaustion.

"They told me that they captured you before, but you were dead. They said that you killed yourself. I believed them at first. But then when I heard about your 'suicide', I knew that they were lying."

"How?" she asked through her tears.

"Because," I said softly "I know that you'd never give up. You're a survivor."

She sort of laughed and choked at the same time.

"You know, I would say the same for you, Peeta." We sat in silence for a few minutes.

I finally broke the awkwardness by asking, "So, uh, what about you and ah, Gale?"

She blushed and I prepared for the worst.

"He's dating Madge."

I almost fell out of the bed with surprise. Well, it kind of did make sense. "That's great! I bet they make a great couple."

"Oh, they do." Katniss said with a smile.

"But do you know who'd make a better couple?" I said with a smirk as I leaned forward (with an inner groan of soreness)

"Who?" she whispered

I gently took hold of her chin and tilted it up to plant a soft kiss on those lips I've been aching for a long time. I withdrew and simply said, "Us."

She giggled in a non-Katniss way and mumbled something about getting me to bed so she tucked me in and left, but not before saying " Good night, Peeta" and closing the door. Did she say 'I love you'? Or was that my imagination?

I sighed and closed my eyes and drifted to sleep.


	4. Kisses

**Survivor: Chapter 4**

**This chapter has some suggestive *coughsexualcough* themes. Sorry!**

Katniss was excited. Today was the first day that Peeta would walk ever since had woken up.

Actually, it was more like a hobble. Coaxing small steps out of Peeta reminded her of when she had to convince him to drink her soup when they were bundled up in the cave last year.

He held on tightly to the frame of the bed with one hand, Katniss holding the other. A new prosthetic leg was fixed on his leg and he was having a difficult time controlling it.

"Come on now. We're almost to the end of the room. Yep. Good, good."Muttered Katniss as she led the shaking boy across the room.

"Whew!" grimaced Peeta as he sat down in a chair. "Not doing that again."

Katniss rolled her eyes and sat down next to him. "We'll be doing that every day until you're comfortable enough to start doing other things."

"Only if I get more of those kisses", he joked.

The conversation suddenly turned awkward.

Peeta changed the subject. "So, uh. Are we, you know. Together, now?" He tensed and his eyes smoldered.

Katniss leaned toward him; he was holding his breath, wondering what she was going to do. She'd never done this before, but hoped she'd get it right the first time. She closed her eyes and caught his lips with hers and started, well, making out.

It was like nothing she'd ever experienced. A thousand times better than that time in the cave.

He held one hand to the side of her beautiful face and the other on her hip. She was so amazing and so perfect for him that it hurt. He had never wanted her more. He slipped his tongue across her bottom lip and she shivered. Her lips parted and he started exploring every crevice in her sweet mouth.

At this point, Peeta had gotten the strength to stand up so that their bodies were molded to each other. Katniss' head was tilted up so he could reach her mouth and her hands were up the back of his shirt. Peeta's hands were permanently glued to her hips, slowly pushing her closer and closer to the wall without missing a beat of kissing.

_I want you. I want you._ Screamed Peeta's thoughts, over and over again.

Suddenly, the kissing turned competitive. He kissed her so hard that their teeth clacked together. She gently bit his bottom lip and he growled, deep in his throat.

At this point, his hands were playing with her bra strap and her hands were in his hair, tugging and pulling. It hurt a little, but felt good with the kissing.

Katniss could barely register the movements he was making until her head hit the wall with a bang.

"Sorry sweetheart," Peeta chuckled into her mouth.

"mmmfff"

He shoved his leg between her legs and the wall and continued to kiss her as if his life depended on it. In a way, it kind of did. He needed her. She needed him.

They separated and Katniss looked up at him in concern. He tugged the edge of her shirt and she nodded in understanding.

The item of clothing was off in an instant, along with her bra.

Peeta began gently playing with her and she moaned into his mouth as the kissed. In any other situation, she would've been terrified and embarrassed, but for some strange reason, it felt right. I mean, she loved him, he loved her, so why not?

Soon after was Peeta's shirt.

Now, as her hands were wandering across his chest and abs, she was shocked at what she felt. Since when did he grow so strong?

This groping and kissing went on for a while. It could've been only five minutes, but it felt like days.

In their dreamy states, they didn't notice a man open the door and stand wide-mouthed at them.

"When you're done feeling each other up, come down to dinner, okay?" The door slammed, and you could hear Haymitch mutter, "Teenagers..."

They pulled apart quickly, red flickering on their faces as they realized what happened.

Katniss covered herself up, Peeta, ducking his head. He looked up after a while and smirked.

He said, "Well, he said when we were done, and I'm pretty sure I wasn't done…"

Katniss just laughed and threw his shirt at him.

They dressed quickly and left the room holding hands.


End file.
